Define Me

5 comments
This week’s Sex Bloggers For Mental Health prompt is PTSD. Here’s a poem based on my own personal experience with PTSD.

Pushed.

Hit.

Thrown.

Trapped.

These words used to

Define me.

Hurt.

Anger.

Sadness.

Fear.

These words use to

Define me.

The nightmares plagued me

For years.

The terror I felt anytime I

Was near.

The place we met.

The place we lived.

It still makes me sick.

What you did.

How you did it.

How you hurt me.

Abused me.

Destroyed me.

I was weak.

Anxious.

Scared.

The flashbacks were

The worst.

You broke me

In the worst way.

You hurt me physically

But the mental

Pain

The stigma

Of being her.

The abused woman.

The woman who went back.

They warned me.

Told me not to.

But I needed security.

For me.

For him.

You gave me that.

At least at first.

Then you became

The worst.

Jack made you evil.

But the beer is what did it.

The anger.

The names.

The hurt.

You made me scared.

To breathe.

To live.

But I fought

Hard.

I’m different now

In the best way.

You tore me down

But I built me up.

I fought

Hard

To get here.

Where I am today.

Eight years later.

I’m different.

I’m stronger.

I’m better.

You hold no power

Over me

Anymore

PTSD is what

It was.

That changed me.

Made me stronger.

The hardest years of

My life.

Followed that night.

But I’m different.

Changed.

Better.

Happy.

Stronger.

These words now

Define me.

I know who I am

Now.

And I’m not who

You tried to make

Me be.

I’m better.

So thank you.

Thank you for

The trauma

You put me through

Because I’m a better person

Now.

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5 comments on “Define Me”

  1. That’s a very powerful piece. It reminds me of all the words I hear from people I am close to who suffer PTSD for very similar reasons.

    There’s a lot said here and the positive note to finish is what I know my own friends wish to aspire to.

    Thank you for linking it on SB4MH

    melody x

    1. Thank you! It took a lot of time and work to get where I am today. I hope your friends who are suffering from it can find their own peace one day! ❤️

      You are welcome! I wrote it yesterday and spaced adding my link to the page! But I fixed it this morning when I remembered. ❤️

  2. Thank you so much for sharing this. Powerful and there is a lot of strength coming through! I am glad that you didn’t let your trauma define you but instead turned into something that gives you strength instead!

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